Updated: Jun 1
A couple of days ago; I have decided to share one of my intimate drawings on public platforms. I am a new writer and sharing my "work" in writing community groups will help me grow, and the feedback will help me develop. But, as many of us, I am also sensitive - extra sensitive - and you can say I am "sensitive towards criticism." especially if it is a little bit harsh and not to my favor. A trait that I need to work with.
Accepting criticism is a skill not so many people acquire. While constructive criticism, should be accepted there is a fine line between it and just "being rude and disrespectful." It depends on the person and what is perceived as acceptable and okay, and what is not. It is, almost, impossible to be considerate to everyone. "Something you say will offend someone somewhere in the world." it is what it is. We are not messiahs or prophets, we do not have the magic ability to be angels to everyone. We are only humans, however, we are able to filter out what we allow to enter our minds and what should not enter.
When I receive an opinion that is not to my liking, I tended to take it personally. I used to dwell on it and wonder why the person had to be "rude and insensitive." You can imagine the impacts this had on my mental wellbeing. Then, with years passing, I realized that not everyone on the planet will say something that will be accepted to me, that is when I realized I needed to change how I perceived other "opinions". While some people are just "trolls" and "rude", not every opposing opinion is considering "annoying" or "not acceptable" even if it is for me. So, here is a coll technique I have constructed to myself to be ablet o accept opposing opinions without getting distracted and demotivated.
Changing "distractions" into "attractions"
Any external opinion about your work can act as a "distraction' for your creative process if you allow it to be. But, you can always turn that "distraction" into an "attraction"- something that will attract you to keep going and develop yourself. There are some opinions that can act as triggers for you to stop what you are doing, or to give up. Your mind starts to act up and tells you "look, I told you no one will like your work - look what you have done. You made a fool of yourself." then, you can drown yourself into these thoughts and put your progress on halt.
Do not fall into that trap. Attempt to distract your mind, every time it drives you to think negatively about yourself and how you progress. "It is just an opinion, they do not know me personally. They are not attacking me, their opinions are not a reflection of who I am. It is what THEY see not what I see." Keep telling yourself that every opposing opinion is an "attraction function" for you to keep going and make yourself better. Take what others tell you, filter out what you need, and leave out the rest of the "noise". It is not an easy process, but it is doable.
"Others do not define you. You define you."